Joint Contrast

By – J.C.

A couple muggy nights ago, as I made my way home from a long road trip, I decided to make a quick pit stop at the most widely known of all fast food joints, McDonald’s.

I try not to frequent such places anymore but every now and then I choose convenience over cautiousness, forgoing healthier alternatives for an oversaturation in culinary heroin.

Guess I’ve been away for a while. Mickey D’s has a newer, bigger burger for drive-thru nation to overstuff their cheeks with. And they seem pretty proud of these burgers made of Angus beef, for whatever that’s worth to the unsuspecting consumer. These new creations come in a noticeably larger box and are an overserving of a one-third pound of livestock. More meat, more bun, and of course those two pieces of cheese that fast food crack heads can’t get enough of.

Of the three Angus choices available I decided to try the mushroom-swiss burger. This, after staying committed to chicken and fish from my “normal” dinner menus as of late. But then out came the cup from behind the counter with my receipt, and the reality that I not only was getting the burger, but a soda and fries to top it all off. Guess everybody needs a Value Menu in these tough economic times.

I remind the lady behind the counter “I only wanted the burger,” though to no avail. Keep the line moving, I figured. Apparently nobody orders just a sandwich these days. On to filling up my cup with soda. “Sorry for the wait,” she says as the food finally lands on the counter. Her last words being “it’s new, we had to make it fresh” (with a smile.) I knew I should have waited until I got home to eat.

Yet what did I do? I stuffed my face like any good American would. Although, I only made my way through half of that Angus meat before pitching the rest of the dead cow in the trash. Bigger isn’t always better, so the saying goes. I can’t imagine these things becoming a permanent fixture on the menu. But then what the hell do I know? At least the fries were nice and hot.