Take our word for it, everyone has an opinion this time of the year. And this happens to be ours. The Joint Contrast Final Four looks like this – Louisville, Memphis, Pittsburgh and Oklahoma – discuss amongst yourself…
- ‘MIDWEST’ SWINGIN – by Dank Lucas
So here it is folks, the most uninformed analysis of college basketball since Don Imus. Now the extent of my knowledge on the subject this year is the offspring of whatever clips SportsCenter decided to include while I was trying to catch Cavs or Lakers highlights. It doesn’t help when 75% of those clips were of Davidson’s Stephen Curry, the best player in college basketball who’s playing in the NIT. It also doesn’t help that I believe the best team in college basketball is probably the UConn girls. Their margins of victory have been insane!
That being said, I’m determined to out-pick the other three Kung Fools in this little experiment of ours. So after playing back everything ESPN had to say about the tournament since Sunday, then doing a little “Googling,” I have my picks with five reasons I chose them.
1. Boston College and Wake Forest both have wins over UNC and Duke this year. Anytime you do that you’re a threat.
2. Louisville is the regular season and tournament champs of the Big East, a conference boasting three No. 1 seeds, and that’s no small feat for Rick Pitino’s Cardinals. That’s who I have advancing to the championship game.
3. West Virginia, another Big East team, has wins over Pitt and Villanova, plus Coach Bobby Huggins likes to party like the rest of us. They advance to the Elite 8.
4. Michigan State dominated the Big Ten this year, a conference whose teams fared well against quality competition. Texas, Louisville, UCLA, and Duke all fell to Big Ten teams so don’t count out the Spartans.
5. The returning champion Kansas Jayhawks have as good a chance as anyone with late-season wins over high-ranked teams such as Texas, Oklahoma and Missouri
- ‘WEST’SIDE CONNECTION – by Ray-Way Wallace
The NCAA Tournament Million Dollar Pick ‘em, that’s one payment that will never be made. You have a better chance hittin’ the lottery or getting struck by lightning than picking every selection correctly.
So let’s just go with my perspective of the West, or at least my best guess of what I believe could happen. But as religion has shown us, we all have a wide variety of beliefs.
So we start with No. 1 Connecticut, coming out of the strongest conference in college basketball they should slide through the first two games easily, even if they face some challenges when they go against defensive-minded Purdue, who’s fresh off of a Big Ten Tournament championship.
Memphis, Missouri, and always-scary Marquette, fills out the bottom half of the bracket. And as I see it, I have Missouri losing when they face off with athletic Marquette, who in turn I have losing to disciplined, well-balanced and well-coached Memphis, a team I see matching up against Connecticut in the region finals.
That game should be an intriguing one as I believe coaching will make as much of a difference as the players will. Taking nothing away from UConn Coach Jim Calhoun and the great work he’s done recruiting, he just doesn’t seem to be able to get these players to excel to their potential. And the fact that their 7’3″ star at times looks more like Manute Bol than he does a true NBA prospect, I give this win to Memphis and Coach John Calipari as they should have no problem running up and down the court and running UConn right out of the tournament.
And that ends my guessing session as of now, and I hope I’ve guessed right. But then again, if not, I’ll be back to guess again…
- ‘EAST’ERN PHILOSOPHY – by TimS
While Dank, Ray-Way and J.C. all watch the top seeds from their respective regions take a just-had-my-anus-ripped-through-violent-penetration-shit all over the polished hardwood floor, Pittsburgh will have no problem sliding through the weakly contested Eastern portion of the bracket.
Sure there are a couple of qualified foes, and the dreaded upset is always looming, but The ‘Burgh will ultimately be crushing Iron City cans in celebration as Pitt dummy-rushes through a couple Tennessee teams and Florida State en route to the Elite 8. This is where they run into Duke. Look for Henderson and Singler to provide a formidable combo. But their combined hairline and cowlick problems will play a pivotal role in their downfall.
It’s Dejuan Blair’s Souf Oakland* thugging (I see you Joe) on the low-post that will prove to be the main reason coach Mike Krzyzewski is shedding multi-syllabic tears. I mean, can you seriously pick one player in the country who Chris Brown’d his opponents quite like the big man from Pitt? Twice this year he had UConn’s Hasheem Thabeet singing “Ella Ella” while he literally flung him around like a Jesus-juiced seven-year old at Michael Jackson’s Dubai Mansion. So don’t expect anyone unfortunate enough to be in this region to have better results.
So it’s on to the Final Four, Detroit bound. Anybody hoping to make it out with a piece of nylon better wear a fucking helmet.
(* – he’s actually from “The Hill” district but I really wanted to write “Souf Oakland”)
- ‘SOUTH’ERN HOSPITALITY – by J.C.
Everyone expects the best of both worlds this time of year – a big upset to shock the brackets AND the mighty collision of the best talent college basketball has to offer.
But you can’t have it both ways.
If you’re putting your monopoly money on an upset in the Dirty South Region then you’re bound to be disappointed.
Not even the high school head coach of LeBron James will be able to lead the Zips over the always over-hyped Zags of Gonzaga. And if you believe otherwise, than let’s just say you might be smoking that same stuff Pepper been puffin’ on over on the west side of Akron.
Nah, not even The King himself could help the only Mid-American Conference team invited to The Dance advance in the tourney. (Wait! I didn’t just type that, did I?)
But I do like No. 12 Western Kentucky to take down No.5 Illinois and No. 11 Temple to dismantle No. 6 Arizona St. in first round upsets. Though neither should get very far thereafter.
That’s because the balance of No. 4 Gonzaga and the heart-and-hustle of No. 3 Syracuse will prove too much to overcome.
That means the Southern Hospitality suite will be filled with the top four seeds entering the Sweet 16 as No. 1 North Carolina (by way of No. 16 Radford and then No. 8 LSU) and No. 2 Oklahoma (by way of No 15 Morgan State and barely No. 7 Clemson) remind the field that the O.G.’s are still alive.
In corner No. 1, introducing 6-9, 250-pound forward Tyler Hansbrough out of UNC and in corner No. 2, introducing 6-10, 251-pound forward Blake Griffin out of OU. It’s a fight to the death in an old-school steel cage match called the Region Finals where the Sooners reign supreme.
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